Con Los Años Que Me Quedan

    On May 27,1979, my mother gave me life. Exactly twenty seven years later on May 27,2006, my long time girlfriend changed it forever. That was 5 years ago today. (Wow!) (sorry about that) I married the woman who changed my life. It should come as no surprise to anybody that she remains the main source of my happiness today. She means more to me than she'll ever know. She's blessed me with 2 beautiful children. She's taught me so much about life AND love. Cleaning up after myself? Well, we're still working on that. (ask me again in 5 years) We've been together for almost 13 years and in that time, as you can imagine, we've been through a lot. We've seen more "Ups &  Downs" than Dodger fans on "Bobble Head Night" (go ahead, get the visual) but through it all we have remained a team. When it seemed I had nobody behind me, I had her by my side.
    Our kids came before our marriage but the last five years have been the most "productive". We bought a new car together and at that time knowing if we did, we'd have to wait on buying a house. But as life surprised us, we didn't have to wait as long as we thought IF we were willing to make a sacrifice. Two years later, we bought that house. We all fell in love with the house..even if it was 60 miles from the kid's school and our jobs. That was the sacrifice. I still can't believe it at times and we've been living in it for a year and a half already. I'm most happy of the fact that it's ours. My parents never bought a house and moving around like I did as a kid is not something my kids will have to go through.
    Anna, I have you to thank for that.
    We're only 5 years into forever,baby. I thank you and I love you.
    We were interrupted during our "First Dance" and never got to finish it but I pray everyday that God will allow us  until the end of time to to keep on dancing.
    Con  los años que me quedan por vivir, Demostraré cuanto te quiero.

Chicano_Soul

   So I changed my twitter name (again) recently and have been asked a couple times, "why?".
First let me say that this will be the last time I change it. I don't know why I didn't start off with this name in the first place. I've been Chicano before I knew what Chicano was. I've always thought about my soul and what would ultimately become of it. I share the "Chicano Soul" with a lot of people but just like we each have our own memories, our souls are unique as well.
   I remember as a kid worrying about my mom and the pain she tried so desperately to drown out with alcohol. I remember worrying about her soul. I began to think that her soul would never be at rest until her body was.
   I began to worry about myself. Maybe I would never know peace until she was at rest. Not something you want to think of but it still crossed my mind many times. Maybe by me worrying so much, I'd keep the cycle going. I couldn't do that.
   When I say I worry about my soul, I don't mean that I'm a serial killer and I'm worried about whether it'll end up in heaven or hell. I've always had a strong conscience. For the most part, I've always walked the straight and narrow. I worry because I have people in my life I never want to let down. I also live for the people who are no longer in my life. I try to succeed for them everyday.
   Good or bad, I've learned something from all of them so I am thankful but at the end of the day I just hope my soul finds peace before my body does.

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Thank You

Music... or should I say *GOOD* music usually makes me think. It's funny how one thought leads to another and that thought leads to another and so on...and so on. Bobby Womack is preaching from the innards of my phone and it's not long before my mind starts jumping from thoughts about my wife to my kids to my parents back to my wife back to my kids. I think about my son the longest. Such a beautiful kid. He looks just like his mother. (No use denying it) There, I said it. He has my ears and he's tall for his age like I was and although he's smarter than I was, he might be just as lazy. I'm confident he'll accomplish so much more in his life than I have. I watch him teach himself songs to play on his guitar. I WATCH more than I encourage and compliment. Note to self: Say what you're thinking when you think it. My Grandpa used to ber like that. He was quiet all the time. I do the same thing with my wife. She'll never know how much I love and appreciate her. Maybe she would if I said it more often. After everything we've been through in the almost 13 years we've been together, there is no one on this planet I'd rather be with. Maybe I should talk more and blog less?

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Everything's Gonna Be Alright

I was sitting in the Police station waiting to speak to the officer at the desk when I saw a man walk in with his young son. The boy walked through the door and headed straight to his mom who had already been sitting there waiting for his dad to drop him off. I put the two and two together and right then and there said a prayer for that kid.

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"You ain't living, unless you're giving"

A few months ago I was faced with a real humbling experience. A few days before pay day and the money in the bank was wayyy below my comfort zone. I had to decide whether to risk it and hope nothing bounced or ask my dad for some monetary assistance. I knew that by me asking, I might be showing that buying a house so far away was not as good of an idea as we first thought. Like maybe we bit off more than we could chew with what we spend on gas alone. I decided to ask because I felt that having money in the bank was more important than how low I'd feel asking to borrow some. I picked up the phone and asked and dad told me he kept money to the side for that specific reason. Wait. Did he just say he expected me to come running to him for help? No. It was more like "just in case" and he was happy he could help. We have since paid him back and have been fortunate enough to be in a position to help someone else in their time of need when WE were asked. My dad often talks about how the help you give someone, no matter how small can eventually affect so many people (assuming people continue to pay it forward). He often says, "You ain't living, unless you're giving". Now I don't know if that's something he came up with but I sure can dig it.
P.S. Be sure to check back soon as I will be paying it forward again.

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Throwin' up the "W's"

I'm NOT going to start this post off with a lie. I'll be honest and say I finally MADE the time to accept my sons challenge to a basketball game. In my defense though, the schedule we have doesn't allow us much free time... that is unless you count all the time we sit around in the car while we make our way to and from L.A. I'm glad we finally got to play. The kid has some skills and I should know. I wasn't too bad myself back in the day. I played for Roosevelt High School's B team and would have eventually made Varsity if I hadn't tore 3 ligaments in my knee right before JV tryouts and...well that's enough about me. This post is about him. He hit some nice shots during our games. His initials spell A.I.M. after all so should it be any surprise? He claimed to be nervous during the two games we played and I believe him. As I sat and watched him shoot around after our second game though I couldn't seem to concentrate on one thought at a time. A bunch of things came at me at once. How did he get this old/tall so fast? Is he enjoying this day w/his dad as much as I'm enjoying the day with him and as much as I enjoyed the games I played my dad? Why did it take so long to get out here for a game? We had the small park to ourselves so there wasn't any rush. I left the park with a sore knee, sore foot and the next day felt like I threw my back out but who cares? I also left with a couple "W's" in my win column so I'm not complaining. Hey I have to enjoy them while I can.

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